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 How Many Red Flags Can You Find On This First Date?

AUGUST 28, 2022

This is a true story that jut happened to me only a few weeks ago. Some red flags are more obvious than others, some you might not think are red flags, but you might learn a few things to look for or what you can change in yourself to get a first date. So, tell me in the comments below if you agree with how many red flags I found and I'll send you a discount code to my store. 

Here we go, how many red flags can you find on this first date?

We had only messaged each other two times when Mike asked me to go to a concert the following weekend. I'm usually much more cautious about going out that fast, but I was desperate to get out and since I love music I decided to take a change at this opportunity and said yes. 

When the concert day arrived I made sure to get to our pubic meeting place 10 minutes early, just in case. Mike arrived 30 minutes late. He pulled up right behind me and got out of his vehicle, I could see him in my rear view mirror and the man that stepped out was nearly twice as heavy as the pictures online. Since heavy people don't bother me, I got out and shook his hand. Sized up the situation and felt I was okay to continue on the date.

Honestly, the love of music and the opportunity to go to a concert was out weighing the red flags to this point, so I hopped into his vehicle and off we went to the concert. After we arrived and walked up to the front doors, I discovered that they were still locked and that they don't open for another 2 hours! He knew this and didn't tell me that we were arriving 2 hours early, so he can get in line. The tickets are assigned seating, so standing in line for hours doesn't change where we sit and is just a waste of time to me. To top it off, he ignored me the whole 2 hours and talked to others in the line, sometimes walking off, leaving me standing there alone. 

Once we finally got inside he turned to me asking if I was hungry, I replied that I was and we went to get food. I asked if he wanted his own meal or if he wanted to share something, he said that we can share chicken strips and fries. I agreed. After getting the food we wiggled our way through the crowd and found our seats on the 8th row. He sits down, turns his massive back to me, blocking the food completely and proceeded to eat everything, he didn't even offer me a fry. 

Finally, the concert started and I started having fun, but there was an extremely drunk man sitting next to us that was being rude and obnoxious. For the most part, we just ignored him and enjoyed the concert. Then he got very loud and started heckling the singers, screaming obscenities' and telling them to get off the stage and never come back. I waited for Mike to say something, but he just looked the other way, so I stepped up. I reached over and popped him on the shoulder, just enough to get his attention and told him to be nice. At first he was annoyed, but I then explained that we're here to have a fun and have a positive experience and would like him to stop being negative because the bands worked very hard to get on that stage and that he couldn't do any better. He immediately calmed down and apologized. The rest of the concert was a blast. 

After the concert we headed back, he started quizzing me on the bands and names of classic music. I told him that I'm not good at band names, that I just love the music. He kept quizzing me. I mentioned again, that I won't know these answers and he started picking on me. He started asking me questions again and I again told him that I really don't know band names. Then he started harassing me and never let up all the way to the park-n-ride.

It felt like forever, but when we finally arrived back at my vehicle, I jumped out and headed to my drivers side door.  Unlocked it and tossed my purse on the front seat. Suddenly he was right next to me, wiggling his way between  me and my vehicle door, to block me from getting into the vehicle. He large size basically squeezed me into the bushes next to me, I stumbled into them and nearly fell over. When I turned around he had his hands on the door and side of the vehicle, completely blocking me from getting in. That scared me and I wanted to freak out, but knew that wouldn't help in any way, so I took a few deep breaths and stayed calm. 

He started small talk, but it was 1:30 am and I hadn't eaten anything since I ate a Toaster Pastry that morning for breakfast. I was tired, hungry and annoyed. Seeing way to many red flags to feel comfortable talking to this strange man that late at night in a nearly deserted parking lot. I took another deep breath and humored his small talking for a moment, then said I needed to go. He asked if I wanted to go on another date. I hate hurting peoples feelings, but I felt this time I needed to make sure this guy had a definitive answer and gave him a gentle, but solid no. Gratefully he then moved to the side and let me get in and get away from him.

So there you have it. How many red flags did you find?  I'll now show you my answers below.  Do you agree?

Flag 1: There are a lot of sick people out there that prey on desperate single females. Taking sometime to get to know an online prospect and then speaking to them over the phone is important to do before a first date. One of the rules I have in place is to make the fellow send me a quick video of his face and him saying my name, so I know that who I'm actually speaking to is really the person on the profile and not someone that is just trying to scam or catfish me. In my experience, there has been way more scammers and catfishing accounts than real people on dating sites. 

Flag 2: If a man can't respect you enough to be on time to a first date, he won't respect you in a relationship. You deserve a man that can be reliable.

Flag 3: When someone's profile photos don't represent their current self, they are basically lying. Misrepresenting who you really are speaks volumes about what you think about yourself and how little respect you have for the person you're wanting to date. 

Flag 4: Standing in line for 2 hours, for no apparent reason and ignoring the person your dating the whole time is selfish and rude. A little heads up would have been nice or a discussion on the time line would have been courteous. 

Flag 5: What kind of man agrees to share food with you, then selfishly eats every single bite?  I don't know ... I was so perplexed by this behavior that I just sat there staring at his back with my jaw nearly hitting the floor? Does anyone have any answers to this behavior?  Maybe his was really that hungry? I would have been fine buying my own food, he just needed to tell me. 

Flag 6: A man should be able to protect his date, not make her step in and do it. That man was getting belligerent, was inappropriately touching me and could have become a threat if someone didn't calm him down. It shouldn't be up to the woman to take care of a potentially dangerous situation. 

Flag 7: If someone doesn't want to talk about a subject and gets harassed about it, instead of just changing the subject ... well you know! Don't pick on your date people.

Flag 8: Never block a woman from getting into her car, this will throw her into fight of flight mode and you might not like how things turn out. Most women I know immediately think they are going to get raped or killed when a man blocks her from escaping. This will never get you a second date. 

Tell me how many flags you agree with and why? I would love to know your opinion. I asked several of my friends about this situation to make sure I wasn't being to sensitive and they all agreed that I should never date this guy again.

Do you think I should give this guy a second chance?

https://dragoyle.com/blogs/dragoyle_diary/how-many-red-flags-can-you-find-on-this-first-date

 

6 Ways To Start A Fire Without Matches or a Lighter

AUGUST 5, 2022

In this blog we'll give you 6 ways to start a fire without matches or a lighter. 

Hopefully, you'll never be in a position where you don't have any matches or a lighter to start a fire. Whether that is when you're out camping or in emergency situations. You should always have a few backup ways to keep warm during a survival situation, so lets get prepared. A perfect way to keep prepared is to have waterproof matches in your emergency kit, but what if you don't have that kit with you. Let's explore 6 other ways you can start a fire. 

1. To Start A Fire Without Matches or a Lighter With A Tinder Kit - Starting a fire from scratch is difficult enough even with matches. Without matches, it's even harder. To give yourself a head-start on starting a fire, bring a tinder kit with you. A tinder kit should consist of material that is dry and easy to use in the creation of a fire. You can tease apart rope fiber into soft, thin threads; cotton balls soaked in Vaseline work especially well; and you can always buy tinder kits. If you're caught without any tinder material on you, or if what you have has gotten wet, look for cedar trees or birch trees. The bark of these trees can be shredded to create some quick tinder. Cattails also work as natural tinder material.

2. To Start A Fire Without Matches or a Lighter With Flint and Steal - One of the easiest ways to start a fire is using flint and steel. Flint and steel kits can be purchased relatively inexpensively online or in stores. Using a tinder kit with flint and steal will create a fire pretty easily especially if you have magnesium as well, but if you don't have a tinder kit and you can use charcloth, scrap dry bark off of cedar or birch trees, look for old dry moss or other small very dry materials. Magnesium starts on fire fast and super easy, I highly suggest having some in your emergency kit. 

Making a fire with flint and steel has three essential steps:

1. Create a spark by striking the flit with your steal in a downward motion
2. Catch that spark in your tinder kit or dry material bundle.
3. Turn the spark into a flame by gently blowing into the spark in a slow steady way, over and over until it burst into flame.

To complete the first two steps, take a small amount of charcloth or tinder and lay it flat against the flint. If you have some Magnesium, scrape some shavings in a small pile on top of your tinder bundle. Next, strike the flint with your metal. You should see sparks immediately, but only if you strike the flint at the right angle. One of these sparks should eventually land on the charcloth or tinder, giving it a tiny orange glow. That tiny glow is enough to start a fire with; you should transfer the charcloth to the tinder nest when the glow appears, gently wrapping the charcloth into the tinder nest and then blowing on it gently and steadily. The tinder nest should smoke and produce a flame almost right away. You can feed the flame with small kindling, such as dried grass, dry pine needles, or twigs, and then use the more stable flame to light sticks, building up to get your logs on fire.

3. To Start A Fire Without Matches or a Lighter With A Glass Lens - Some children discovered this method on accident as children when they melted toys with a magnifying glass or caught a bug on fire.
With a magnifying glass and an unobstructed view of the sun, you can easily use the magnifying glass method to start a fire. A magnifying glass that rotates in and out of a vinyl case, as opposed to a magnifying glass with a handle, is ideal for traveling with because it is small and more effective.

This method is simple, but might take a few minutes, so be patient. Put your tinder bundle on the ground or with your kindling, then aim the beam of the sun at the tinder nest so the beam of sun coming through is a tight stream of sun, the more condensed the sun stream the better. Keep it steady in the same spot on the tinder bundle until it begins to smoke. When it starts smoking, gently blow on the tinder bundle until you produce a flame.

Using a magnifying glass to start a fire is easy, but it depends upon having a decent amount of sunlight. Since you can't always depend on the sun being out, it's good to have more methods on-hand than just the magnifying glass such as a Tinder Bundle Kit with Windproof/Waterproof Matches.

4. To Start A Fire Without Matches or a Lighter with An Alternative To A Glass Lens. Besides using a glass lens to capture the rays of the sun and produce a fire, you can also use a Solar Lighter, water-filled balloon or a mirror to achieve the same effect. When using water inside a balloon, try to make the shape into a sphere. The more spherical the container is, the more effective it will be at focusing the rays of the sun.

If you don't have a mirror on hand, you can polish the bottom of a soda/beer can with toothpaste or chocolate and turn it into a mirror. By the way, if you use this last method, don't eat the chocolate after you've polished your aluminum can with it; the chocolate may contain toxic residue.

5. To Start A Fire Without Matches or a Lighter by Using Friction. One of the most famous ways to start a fire without a match is also one of the most difficult: using the friction between two pieces of wood. To use this method, make a v-shaped notch in a board or log, and choose a spindle that will create the friction. Rub the spindle between your hands as fast as you can, moving your hands up and down the spindle rapidly. When the board or log begins to smoke, use your tinder nest to catch the glowing spark you've produced.

You can also create a bow drill instead. The bow drill is easier than the primitive method described above, but it requires you to make a proper bow first, which is harder.

6. WHEN IT'S WET OUTSIDE. What if you're in a worst-case scenario situation and your wet and cold? Your matches and lighter have both gotten wet and won't work. You have a tinder kit, along with some flint and steel, but your tinder kit has gotten wet, as well. The downpour has also made the forest around you wet, so there is virtually no dry kindling or dry wood anywhere to be found. Are you stuck at this point? No. If you're resourceful, you can still start a fire.

Start by finding some dry tinder, I know that everything is wet, but here's how. The aforementioned birch or cedar bark works well in this scenario, but you will need to peel a few layers of bark off to get to the dry bark.

As for finding dry wood, look for a standing dead tree. Unlike a dead tree that's lying on the forest floor, a standing dead tree will usually be dry inside. Peel away the rotted, wet, outer section of the tree to get to the dry wood on the inside to get to the dry kindling. Once you have a decent blaze going, you can use even damp limbs and twigs in your fire, because the heat of the fire will be strong enough to catch damp wood at that point.

The 6 ways to start a fire above are the most important ones to understand when thinking about building a fire outdoors without a match. Whenever you go camping or hiking, it's a good idea to have at least three different tools to start a fire with, along with your tinder kit.

Did we miss any other useful ways to start a fire without a match? If so, mention your favorite ways to start a fire in the comments section below and receive a discount code to purchase your fire making kits.